A Guide To Being Anti-Racist in Fire Island
Fire Island, more specifically the neighborhoods of Cherry Grove and the Pines are often touted as two of the most welcoming destinations in the country for people in the LGBT+ community. But recent events have validated what I have known for a long time. These places don’t always feel welcoming to everyone, and particularly not to black and brown people. A post on social media has recently pulled the curtains back on that, and to say that people let their true colors show is an understatement. But despite the overtly racist rhetoric that was spewed, people with opposing views showed up to make the discussion a teachable moment. And before a week goes by and people forget that anything even happened, we need to discuss how to bridge the divide that so many people didn’t even know existed. Racism on Fire Island is real, but so is allyship, and both need to be put under the microscope.
Yesterday morning in the Cherry Grove Untucked Facebook group, someone posted photos of the Cherry Grove Community Center. Three outdoor areas of the building had the letters “BLM” spray painted on them in white, and the caption to the post read, “I’m heartbroken. Why is vandalism necessary?” This led to a barrage of responses, ranging from those expressing disapproval of the action to those who wanted to explore why someone would be moved to do such a thing in the first place. Some people were quick to blame supporters of the Black Lives Matter movement, while others expressed that this action was juxtaposed to their message, and how it must have been someone who wanted to discredit what these recent protests have been all about. Seeing as how a BLM demonstration was scheduled to take place that afternoon in the Grove, this could have very well been the case. What really stood out was the amount of people who came into the comments to say that this particular act of vandalism is exactly why “All Lives Matter”. Numerous people expressed sentiments of shock to see the conservative views of people in their beloved Cherry Grove. But for every person who called attention to the vandalism, there were 5 more people who would jump in to pull the focus back to the injustices that black people have experienced in this country for centuries. They reminded them of the lost lives of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor, police brutality and murder, and how all of these things have yet again reached a boiling point that has caused the world to erupt in protest against racism. For those who were focused on property, I offered up a little quip that I have seen floating around social media that I thought could help people shift their perspective;
Instead of saying, “It’s horrible that an innocent black man was killed, but the vandalism needs to stop,” try saying, “It’s horrible that property was destroyed, but killing innocent black men needs to stop.”
Racism permeates every fabric of our society whether we want to admit it or not. Every single system in this country was built on racism, and over time, every one of them has been shaped or restructured in a way that is still meant to oppress people of color. And it’s interesting that when we think of Fire Island, we often think of it as a place to get away from the burdens of the real world. Yet here we are, finally having to face the fact that the real world follows us wherever we go. Something that I was happy to see was the amount of white people calling out their fellow white people on their problematic views and inherent privileges. It’s something that I’ve noticed about this particular moment in time. White silence is, even if only marginally, less loud. And this is one type of allyship that is so important. In addition to that people called for members of the group to donate money toward having the graffiti cleaned off while also asking for a donation to a BLM supportive group. Donations are such an integral part of progression. This a fight for equality. Equality in the housing market, job market, education, healthcare, and justice. There are organizations on the ground doing the real hard work, but they need money.
A direct message sent to me after the comments had closed on the “Cherry Grove Untucked” post.
On #blackouttuesday millions of people around the world posted a black square on their Instagram to show solidarity with the BLM movement. Naturally people had mixed feeling about it. Some said that it made them feel good to see how many people actually gave a damn, while others said that it didn’t serve to really get anything done. Many people and companies also posted who they gave donations to, found entities who could match donations, and called for their followers to do the same. One post that stood out to me was from PJ McAteer. PJ, who with a business partner, purchased a large strip of the Pines harbor (which include businesses such as The Blue Whale, Sip & Twirl, The Pavilion, Canteen, and more) for $10mil in 2015, has been giving updates on the status of the Pines amidst the pandemic since late March. A week ago he posted a message that expressed his disdain for the injustices that black people have continually been suffering, reminded his followers about how LGBTQ+ liberation began with a riot, and made a call to action by saying, “We have to donate to causes that spread the word and educate.” When someone followed up in the comments offering him specific organizations that he could donate to, his response was, “Sorry right now all funds are to the Pines I need to make sure my businesses survive the pandemic.” Seeing a response like that after reading what looked to be an expression of empathy was disheartening. Seeing how that response directly conflicted with his call to action was confusing. Another person followed up to let him know that as well. His message, followed by his comment are a clear example of performative allyship, and that’s exactly what this movement does not need right now. He would have been better off just posting a black square and with an empty caption. Or do like Daniel Nardicio (owner of Big Dicks Inn and promoter of the legendary DWorld Underwear Party), who despite requests from his employees, chose to say nothing. Saying nothing when the world is burning around you, but it doesn’t directly affect you is privilege. In terms of donations, I have seen people make one from their unemployment. Yesterday I even saw an Instagay who offered to send people nudes in exchange for proof that they sent a donation somewhere. There are people who have no means, that are getting creative! If you’re not donating, it’s because you simply don’t want to.
Now let’s get real. In the four summers that I have come out to Fire Island, I have only ever met one black business owner. I am a black man who is launching a new print magazine out there very soon. I have 1500 circulations that will be going out to the Pines & Cherry Grove in a mere 3 weeks! (You can view the Preview Issue here.) From the time I even conceptualized FAG RAG Magazine, I thought of my skin color as a barrier to entry. I even considered using a pseudonym so that people wouldn’t be able look me up and see that I am black. I worried about how my skin color would affect my ad sales. I wondered whether I should ask shop owners if I can leave some magazines laying around, or if I should get a white friend to ask for me. Seeing performative allyship like the kind above validates my fears. Seeing numerous racist comments firsthand validates my fears. Hearing about racist business owners validates my fears. These are things that white entrepreneurs can’t even begin fathom considering when they sit down to create their business plan. But this struggle isn’t new for me, and over time I’ve learned to compartmentalize it. Because letting those fears stop me from doing what I set out to do, gives a win to the systems of oppression that for centuries, have been designed to make black people feel like we are not good enough.
The “Progress Pride Flag”, design by Daniel Quasar
So what can we do?
After nearly 600 comments amassed in that Cherry Grove Untucked post, I was frustrated. On the one hand, the endless back-and-forth bickering did open the eyes of a lot of people to the true nature of some of the residents and frequent visitors of the Grove. But on the other hand, it didn’t leave us with many solutions to move forward. So I jumped on a Zoom call with NYC nightlife legend Kareem McJagger, and the Cherry Grove fan favorite, Brenda Darling. Both of them are black drag queens. Kareem frequents the island, while Brenda has a weekly summer residency at the Ice Palace in the Grove, and is also one of 4 black Miss Fire Island winners (out of 52). We discussed our experiences on the island and came up with some actionable ways to make Fire Island more inclusive right now.
Fly the “Progress Pride Flag” (pictured above). When the Sayville Ferry is sailing into Cherry Grove, the immediate focal points are the giant rainbow flags that billow over the dock. I have literally heard people give audible sighs of relief when they see it. They’re comforted. They feel welcomed. Feeling welcomed in Fire Island is a privilege. I think a way to make POC, who are already coming with some defenses up, feel welcome, is to fly this flag high on the poles in Cherry Grove, and to hang it off of the upstairs balcony of the Pavilion in the Pines. Here is a way that PJ McAteer can make a difference! And to the people who say that the stripes on the original flag were not meant to represent race; they weren’t meant to represent anything until the artist told you that they should. & there have been 3 versions of that flag already. There is no golden untouchable rule book that says we can’t have a different flag. & if not having a white stripe makes you feel othered, imagine how POC feel for nearly every other thing in life.
Hang a BLM sign, “Progress Pride Flag”, or better yet a “Queer Pride Flag” in front of your house. The “Queer Pride Flag” is my favorite version of the flag that was designed by a brown queer disabled transman, named Scout The Bootblack. Here are the links to buy directly from him: (Flag, shirts, stickers, face masks). Walking around the island and seeing this would bring those same feelings of welcome and comfort to POC.
Support black artists. Every summer there are artist residencies on the island that have invited black artists out to get inspiration and create. BOFFO is one of them.
Encourage your favorite promoters and clubs to hire more black talent. I can name 20 drag queens off the top of my head who have recurring gigs in the Pines or Cherry Grove. Two of them are black. Brenda Darling said that there are actually four. And the most recent two were brought in by other white queens who already had existing shows. Before any of the current crop of black talent were performing on the island, there was only Shequida for quite a long time. Long may she reign! That aside, there is an entire island of queens making money for lip syncing and doing dance moves from a culture that does not belong to them. Which might be fine if they continued to create spaces for their black and brown sisters.
Encourage bars/clubs to hire more black bartenders and dj’s! I’ve never seen a black dj at tea. Ever.
Invite a black friend for a weekend. How many quarter shares clear out on Monday when everyone goes back to work, even though you’ve all paid to stay until Wednesday or Thursday? How many shares don’t mind if you have an extra guest over the weekend? Everyone can’t afford a quarter share. And there are times when you have available space in your house. So use it.
Diversify your share. If you look back at your Fire Island photos, whether it be with friends or with share mates, and the only thing visible is a sea of white bodies and perfect abs, do better! Fire Island is exclusive. Maybe not to you. But for people who have never been or want to go, figuring out where to begin looking for a share can be tricky. And guess what, a lot of black folks want to go. Just ask.
Encourage organizations like Dancers Responding To AIDS and the Pines Party to make donations this year to charities that specifically help queer communities of color.
Make a personal donation to BLM supportive groups. And if you want put a cherry on top, make that donation recurring! The NYC Pride Committee made this working spreadsheet of groups that could use your help. Here is another page that even tells you ways that you can donate without even spending money!
Come out as anti-racist and invite others to join you. Be loud about it. Explain ways that you are actively making an effort to be anti-racist.
Call out your friends who say racist/problematic things or use microagressions. Do this whether you are in the presence of a black person or not.
Let’s bring back “Blackout”. There’s a bear weekend, a Latin weekend, a leather weekend. But apparently the black weekend has been the only one to face resistance from the community. Even if it’s not “Blackout”, Fire Island is long overdue for another weekend filled with black excellence.
Listen. Your experience on the island may be contradictory to what you hear other people say. It’s just that. Your experience. Listen to the experiences of POC and take their word as credible.
Discuss ways to diversify homeownership. This one is for the realtors. According to the Fire Island Pines Property Owner’s Association’s 2018 Quadrennial Survey, 92% of Pines homeowners are white, 2.1% Asian, 1.4% Hispanic, 1 % black, 0.3% multi-racial, and 3.1% other. Obviously structural racism in the U.S. housing system has contributed to stark and persistent racial disparities in wealth and financial well-being, especially between black and white households, but maybe the realtors can get together and discuss what things they can do address that in our little gay mecca.
Use your connections. If you are reading this and you have connections to make any of the things on this list become a reality, use them! Reach out. Phone. Email. Text. Zoom. Skype. WhatsApp. Smoke signal. Facetime. Telepathy. Every single thing on this list can happen if we want it to. Do it right now. And if you are one of the people who can make this happen on your own, do it. Be the change.
Encourage your white friends to do all of the above. Posting something on social media is helpful in terms of educating people, but with no action it is performative. It doesn’t matter how big your following is. Progress takes action.
The “Queer Pride Flag” by Scout The BootBlack
Fire Island is special. It doesn’t even feel like you’re still in the state of New York when there. The beaches are beautiful, the nature is beautiful, the houses are beautiful, and the scene can be really fun. There is something magical about being in a place that is just so gay, that when you’re there, you can truly let your hair down. Even on the gayest corner of Hell’s Kitchen, I would still check my surroundings before kissing another guy in public. Being in a place where that is one less thing to worry about is indescribable. But like anywhere, it’s not perfect. If we as a community come together to make these actionable changes, we can make our way a little bit closer towards that perfection.
